Hopefully you can look past the many typos and errors that are in this post. My computer is currently on the fritz, and I'm writing most of this on my phone. While the blogger app I have on here great, it doesn't really replace having a full keyboard and screen at my fingertips, so you'll have to settle for a post typed with two thumbs and Auto correct text on. (it really is a double edged sword. Like the time I told Michelle I should have got an "Iced Codfish" while at a bakery instead of an "Iced Coffee". Yeah. She can laugh at me, but someone else might think I actually develoved a taste for a frozen fish smoothie)
I've been on this low-carb diet since about March. My parents started doing it a little less than a year ago, and they convinced my Brother Tim to do it. After I saw how much weight they were losing, I thought I would give it a shot as well! We were having a weight loss competition at work, and I was sure doing this diet I could lose some serious fat and make some serious money. I ended up losing (it was a close race. I tied in the number of pounds lost, but lost because I had a less percentage loss), but I really liked the way I felt. I knew that doing this diet doesnt mean that I can just shed a few pounds, and then eat what I want right away. This isn't a quick diet, it's a change in my diet.
After I lost the weight, I started watching what I eat more often. I only drink diet soda now, if any at all. When I go out to eat someplace, I go towards the low-carb option, and substitute fries with a salad (even if you're just trying to be healthy without being low-carb, that is still a better option!). I also decided that if I was invited over to someone's house for dinner, or if someone made dinner for me, I'd eat it. I may be on a diet, but if I am going to be the beneficiary of someone's altruism, then I should accept that gift, and not sound like some condescending jerk saying, "thanks, but what's the carb count on this?" If someone has gone out of their way for you to make you a meal, maybe even inviting you into their house, and they are serving spaghetti and garlic bread, you deal with it.
After I started taking this diet seriously, I started trying to take other parts of my life where there could be improvement. I want to get back into writing again, but I lack the one thing that either makes or breaks a writer; discipline. I'll get on my computer with every intention of writing out the latest story idea, maybe even a chapter or two, a blog post, a poem; anything!
And what do I do instead? I end up on some website looking at a gallery of pictures showing up cute and cuddly animals doing things that make no sense (any one of my Facebook friends can attest to this). I knew this is what I want to do, but I can't even sit down to write a paragraph!
I know I'm not alone in this. I read an article about Jonathan Franzen (an author who some say will be the Great American Author for our generation, and others say is nothing special), and he says he makes himself write on an older laptop that's as thick as a dictionary, has no internet access, and has all the games taken off. Being connected to the internet is a distraction. John Updike would use a typewriter, even after the rise of the computer. Kurt Vonnegut also said he wrote using typewriter like Updike, but felt he was further along in technology than Stephen King, who wrote on legal pads with a pen. I thought I would find out what my thing was, and spent so much time trying to figure that out, I didn't just sit down a write. Looking back at when I did most of my writing, I saw that I did most of my best stuff late at night.
So I stayed up, and wrote more of nothing.
Then I thought I could set some goals, and post them online on my blog on MySpace (this was a few years back) hoping that having people see my goals would make me work harder on them. By simply telling people I was going to do it, because if I didn't, then I wouldn't be a man if my word.
And that didn't last long at all.
Nothing has been happening with writing for me. What it basically boils down to is that little word that I keep avoiding whenever I think about writing: Discipline. No matter what I did, no matter how many times I tried to to change the who, when, where, and how, the "what" has been there telling me why I can't do it.
I need to be disciplined.
Like I said, I suck at discipline. When choosing between reading the book or letting my mind drift while watching TV, that book would never get read. I would always take the easy was out, no matter what...except with this diet.
I liked how this diet changed the way I looked. Some of my co-workers started noticing that I had lost weight, and I liked being about to fit into clothes that I hadn't been able to wear in over a year. And why? Because I disciplined myself when it came to eating. When I ate out, I was that guy who ordered his burger without a bun, who asked for a side salad instead of fries, who drank a diet coke instead of Dr Pepper, and I like who I became. Why can't I do a diet of the mind? Why can't I choose to do what I should, instead of doing what is easy, so I can be a better person?
This all hit me while I was reading the book Quitter by Jon Acuff (I would recommend this book to anyone working somewhere completely different from what they went to school for or what they want to do with their life), and he was talking about how "discipline begets discipline." When you start becoming disciplined in part of your life, then it bleeds over into other parts. That if I learned how to be disciplined in what I ate, then I could be disciplined in how I spent my time.
I finished that book on a Sunday night, and decided I would start right away.
So I set my alarm for 6:00am, and decided I will start getting up early. Not a big change, but one that could be achieved. I would set the coffee machine to 6:00 as well so when I get up I'll have a pot of coffee waiting for me, and I'll sit down and drink a cup (or two or three) while reading. I started reading whatever book I was currently reading (which was Financial Peace by Dave Ramsey), and it has now turned into reading the Bible and having a quiet time. Eventually I hope to start writing more, whether its a short blog post, a devotional on the Ten Commandments (which I'm still working on, mostly for my own benifit) or something more literary like a short story, chapter to a book, or poetry, I want to get there. I realize that I don't have to find the time to do this, I have to make the time.
It is hard, trying to stay disciplined, but I've been encouraged by other people that are writing regularly.
First is my wife, Michelle, who is an amazing writer, and makes writing look easy. Her blog is called "my little corner of the world." She doesn't have a set schedule for when she posts, because she just updates it whenever she has something to say, and usually she does it all in one sitting (compared to me taking days and tons of editing to write a single post). I love it whenever she posts because she has a way of saying something simple that has a lot of meaning to it. I hope to someday be on par with her writing.
The second would be my sister-in-law, Jenna. Her blog is called "I Never Really Told You, But I Meant To...", and she updates it daily. Whether she's telling a story about a recent trip to the Doctor's office, or posting a picture of my brother (her husband) and their dog sleeping on the couch, I can always count on seeing something new from her everyday.
Slowly, I'm turning into the person I want to be, which I've come to realize isn't an overnight process. In fact, I don't think it really has an end. I will keep trying to become a better person. Sometimes I'll fail, but when I do, I'll come back. Part of becoming a better person is remembering you're not perfect.
So please, don't tell me how many typos are on here.
That's my wife's job.
