New Blog Post: Building a Better Me: Diets, Discipline, and Dunkin' Donuts Coffee

Hopefully you can look past the many typos and errors that are in this post. My computer is currently on the fritz, and I'm writing most of this on my phone. While the blogger app I have on here great, it doesn't really replace having a full keyboard and screen at my fingertips, so you'll have to settle for a post typed with two thumbs and Auto correct text on. (it really is a double edged sword. Like the time I told Michelle I should have got an "Iced Codfish" while at a bakery instead of an "Iced Coffee". Yeah. She can laugh at me, but someone else might think I actually develoved a taste for a frozen fish smoothie)

I've been on this low-carb diet since about March. My parents started doing it a little less than a year ago, and they convinced my Brother Tim to do it. After I saw how much weight they were losing, I thought I would give it a shot as well! We were having a weight loss competition at work, and I was sure doing this diet I could lose some serious fat and make some serious money. I ended up losing (it was a close race. I tied in the number of pounds lost, but lost because I had a less percentage loss), but I really liked the way I felt. I knew that doing this diet doesnt mean that I can just shed a few pounds, and then eat what I want right away. This isn't a quick diet, it's a change in my diet.

After I lost the weight, I started watching what I eat more often. I only drink diet soda now, if any at all. When I go out to eat someplace, I go towards the low-carb option, and substitute fries with a salad (even if you're just trying to be healthy without being low-carb, that is still a better option!). I also decided that if I was invited over to someone's house for dinner, or if someone made dinner for me, I'd eat it. I may be on a diet, but if I am going to be the beneficiary of someone's altruism, then I should accept that gift, and not sound like some condescending jerk saying, "thanks, but what's the carb count on this?" If someone has gone out of their way for you to make you a meal, maybe even inviting you into their house, and they are serving spaghetti and garlic bread, you deal with it.

After I started taking this diet seriously, I started trying to take other parts of my life where there could be improvement. I want to get back into writing again, but I lack the one thing that either makes or breaks a writer; discipline. I'll get on my computer with every intention of writing out the latest story idea, maybe even a chapter or two, a blog post, a poem; anything!

And what do I do instead? I end up on some website looking at a gallery of pictures showing up cute and cuddly animals doing things that make no sense (any one of my Facebook friends can attest to this). I knew this is what I want to do, but I can't even sit down to write a paragraph!

I know I'm not alone in this. I read an article about Jonathan Franzen (an author who some say will be the Great American Author for our generation, and others say is nothing special), and he says he makes himself write on an older laptop that's as thick as a dictionary, has no internet access, and has all the games taken off. Being connected to the internet is a distraction. John Updike would use a typewriter, even after the rise of the computer. Kurt Vonnegut also said he wrote using typewriter like Updike, but felt he was further along in technology than Stephen King, who wrote on legal pads with a pen. I thought I would find out what my thing was, and spent so much time trying to figure that out, I didn't just sit down a write. Looking back at when I did most of my writing, I saw that I did most of my best stuff late at night.

So I stayed up, and wrote more of nothing.

Then I thought I could set some goals, and post them online on my blog on MySpace (this was a few years back) hoping that having people see my goals would make me work harder on them. By simply telling people I was going to do it, because if I didn't, then I wouldn't be a man if my word.
And that didn't last long at all.

Nothing has been happening with writing for me. What it basically boils down to is that little word that I keep avoiding whenever I think about writing: Discipline. No matter what I did, no matter how many times I tried to to change the who, when, where, and how, the "what" has been there telling me why I can't do it.
I need to be disciplined.

Like I said, I suck at discipline. When choosing between reading the book or letting my mind drift while watching TV, that book would never get read. I would always take the easy was out, no matter what...except with this diet.

I liked how this diet changed the way I looked. Some of my co-workers started noticing that I had lost weight, and I liked being about to fit into clothes that I hadn't been able to wear in over a year. And why? Because I disciplined myself when it came to eating. When I ate out, I was that guy who ordered his burger without a bun, who asked for a side salad instead of fries, who drank a diet coke instead of Dr Pepper, and I like who I became. Why can't I do a diet of the mind? Why can't I choose to do what I should, instead of doing what is easy, so I can be a better person?

This all hit me while I was reading the book Quitter by Jon Acuff (I would recommend this book to anyone working somewhere completely different from what they went to school for or what they want to do with their life), and he was talking about how "discipline begets discipline." When you start becoming disciplined in part of your life, then it bleeds over into other parts. That if I learned how to be disciplined in what I ate, then I could be disciplined in how I spent my time.

I finished that book on a Sunday night, and decided I would start right away.

So I set my alarm for 6:00am, and decided I will start getting up early. Not a big change, but one that could be achieved. I would set the coffee machine to 6:00 as well so when I get up I'll have a pot of coffee waiting for me, and I'll sit down and drink a cup (or two or three) while reading. I started reading whatever book I was currently reading (which was Financial Peace by Dave Ramsey), and it has now turned into reading the Bible and having a quiet time. Eventually I hope to start writing more, whether its a short blog post, a devotional on the Ten Commandments (which I'm still working on, mostly for my own benifit) or something more literary like a short story, chapter to a book, or poetry, I want to get there. I realize that I don't have to find the time to do this, I have to make the time.

It is hard, trying to stay disciplined, but I've been encouraged by other people that are writing regularly.

First is my wife, Michelle, who is an amazing writer, and makes writing look easy. Her blog is called "my little corner of the world." She doesn't have a set schedule for when she posts, because she just updates it whenever she has something to say, and usually she does it all in one sitting (compared to me taking days and tons of editing to write a single post). I love it whenever she posts because she has a way of saying something simple that has a lot of meaning to it. I hope to someday be on par with her writing.

The second would be my sister-in-law, Jenna. Her blog is called "I Never Really Told You, But I Meant To...", and she updates it daily. Whether she's telling a story about a recent trip to the Doctor's office, or posting a picture of my brother (her husband) and their dog sleeping on the couch, I can always count on seeing something new from her everyday.

Slowly, I'm turning into the person I want to be, which I've come to realize isn't an overnight process. In fact, I don't think it really has an end. I will keep trying to become a better person. Sometimes I'll fail, but when I do, I'll come back. Part of becoming a better person is remembering you're not perfect.

So please, don't tell me how many typos are on here.

That's my wife's job.

Late nights

I've always written my best stuff when I'm sleep deprived, but that doesn't work well for a normal human being. Having a job doesn't seem to help this need to stay up late either.

I've had a few ideas for stories lately, but they've mostly been Science Fiction, which is kinda weird being that I never saw myself as a SciFi writer, which again, is kinda weird since I am a fan of SciFi and fantasy, even though I haven't read much, I like movies and TV shows. I think I'll take a tip from Hemingway and "Write drunk, edit sober." Since I don't get drunk, I'll write when I'm tired and put all the missing pieces together once I'm awake.

And with that, I'm gonna go to bed.

Or maybe I'll stay up...

Time Lords, Post Apocalyptic Death Matches, and Sexy Carrots

I recently finished the Hunger Games trilogy, which helped kick-start my reading habits. It was a good set of books that were easy to read, and it left me wanting to read more books. So why would I go and read a book I've already read? Well, the same reason I blasted through the Hunger Games; the movie is coming out.

I picked up Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. If you have read this book,  then you were probably thinking the same thing I was thinking; "How are they turning that into a movie?"
Well if you watch the trailer you'd see they mostly used the book as inspiration for the movie, and took a lot of creative license in telling a different story that brought up the main points in the book. However, that's not the reason I'm bringing up the book.

I bought the book at a thrift store in Porterville a few days before leaving for my last tour with the Continental Singers. Since I was told so many people that I should read it, and it was only 25¢, that I'd read it on my flight to LAX to rehearsal camp in Kansas City.

After 100 pages we touched down in Missouri, and I had to put the book down. I finished it while at camp, and handed off to someone else on the tour, and after he was done, he gave to someone else, and then to someone else. She didn't finish it before the tour ended, so I let her keep it. I knew I'd buy another one at some point.

This was back in 2007. Who I was back than was a little different from who I am now, which makes reading this book a second time five years later something different. I mean, between the summer of 2007 and this moment, not a whole lot has changed, right?

-Graduated from Porterville College
-Moved to Fresno
-Experienced the negatives and positives of having roommates
-Developed a taste for bourbon, beer, and Coen Brothers movies
-Flew to St Louis over New Years for a missions conference
-Married my girlfriend

Yeah. Nothing much has changed.

The reason this whole thought was brought on was because I read a chapter in the book this morning and I remember what was said, but I took it completely different. A section that I simply read through that had next to no effect on me gave me chills this morning, and it made me think about everything that's changed in the last few years, and what hasn't, and since my Twenty-seventh birthday coming up, I've been thinking about what my Twenty-sixth year was like. So what has happened between since April 4 of last year and now?

-For my Birthday I got The Walking Dead on DVD from friends and the graphic novel from my brother, and it started another obsession for me. So much so that I needed to stop reading about zombies when they kept invading my dreams. (Not that I'm a wimp, but that Michelle doesn't like being woken up by my random sleep-talking. My dreams are the fuel for my crazy story ideas most of the time)
-Our church finally got a Pastor! Since we'd been going to Clovis Evangelical Free Church they have had a transitional pastor. I'd been in to many situations where there was no pastor at a church, and it's not a fun time, especially for new people. You start going to the church, meet people, and they leave with half the church. But something kept us there, and we discovered a sense of community, and when Pastor Wil and his family came, they fit right into our community. Pastor Wil, and his whole family has been a blessing not only for our church, but for Michelle and I as well (for a quick story, check out this blog post from Michelle).
-Michelle and I got to help a good friend, Charles, surprise his wife. If you thought watching "Coming Home" was emotional, try going to the airport and videotaping it! Charles and Melissa Pendleton have been a blessing to us in so many ways. When we watched the surprised look on Melissa's face when she turned around, saw her husband, and jumped into his arms, time stood still. I will never forget this moment for as long as I live.
-Both my brothers got married to some pretty awesome women. I couldn't think of anyone better for Steve and Tim than Krista and Jenna. On top of that, they gave up their awesome last names to become a "Lopez." Now that's love.
-Michelle and I celebrated our first year of wedded bliss. We haven't killed each other yet, but I still have to make it to the second year. I'm pretty sure she will kill me at some point, because I have been the hardest person to live with. She has been more forgiving than anyone I know. I am the luckiest person to have her in my life.
-I was given the honor and privilege to lead worship for my church. It was a lot of work, but I love having those moments when God moves through you and people are blessed.
-We went to Hollywood and saw David Crowder*Band play on their last tour. It's hard to tell how much of an effect this band has had on me as a musician and a Christian. They ended the night with "All I Can Say", which is a song that has followed me through some of the hardest times in my life, and it changed the way I view worship. Their music will be missed.
-Michelle got me into Mad Men. The season five premier was last week, and we had to make sure we finished season three and four in two weeks. And we did.
-I got into Doctor Who like crazy. The only time I ever saw anything Doctor Who related was on PBS a few years ago, and it looked really cheesy. My siblings we all talking about it online, so I thought I'd give it a shot, and I'm hooked. Right now I'm about half-way through season four. I really like David Tennant as The Doctor, and I've heard Matt Smith is a pretty good Doctor, but he'll have to be really good to fill Tennant's shoes.

So those are some of the highlights of my Twenty-sixth year. We'll see what the next holds for me.

This is only a test.

In an attempt to blog more often, I downloaded a new app for my phone.

By the way, I got a new phone! I endex up getting an Android phone (a Samsung Galaxy S II) instead of an iPhone, a decision I came to solely based on money (an Android phone was about $100 cheaper).

So anyway, I got this app for my phone so I can update my blog with my phone. I think what I'll do is write my drafts with my phone, then edit them on my computer.

So before I to bed, I'll give a quick update on myself.
-Haven't heard back from Fresno State about whether or not I'll be going back to school in the fall, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
-I am half way through the last book in the Hunger Games trilogy. I'll give my opinion about it once I'm done with it all.
-I am on the forth season of Doctor Who, which is David Tennant's last season. Kinda sad to see him go, but I know the show only gets better.

That's about all I can think about now. I guess I should finally just go to sleep now. I've got a long week ahead of me.

Music

I've been attempting to write songs again.

I used to have ideas for songs all the time, but would get hung up on lyrics, and than give up on them. I start out with some chords on the Guitar, and then try and sing a melody, and it doesn't go anywhere. When I try to think of words, nothing comes up, and I stop trying.

So I've decided to take a different approach to songwriting.

First, I will write the whole song out musically.

I took the guitar and played a song, including a melody, making sure I can sing it, and then have it mapped out (Verse, Chorus, Bridge, pre-chorus, etc.).

Second, I will write out the lyrics separately.

I've never had a problem writing out poetry. It's not east for me, but it's not super hard, so it's a challenge every time I sit down to write a poem out, but I've never been disappointed with the finished product.

Third, I will find someway to bring the two together.

I haven't gotten this far yet, so I'll report back whenever I get to this step. If I succeed in this step, I might post a song on youtube or something, and is I fall on my face, I'll be posting some new poems up here.

Wish me luck!

The Fountainhead and Culture Making

I've been trying to read as many books as I can since I started my "break" from school, and I've been trying to read as many different books as I can. It must be interesting for my co-workers to see what I've been reading on my breaks, since I went from reading The Walking Dead to The Fountainhead, (with a quick detour with Jimmy Corrigan: The Smartest Kid on Earth, which was a great book) and I'm currently reading Culture Making by Andy Crouch, which gets to why I am posting this blog in the first place.

I think it was a wise choice to go from The Fountainhead into Culture Making.

When I started reading The Fountainhead, I had heard the main points of the novel from a lot of places. I heard it was a good book for thinking people, and that most Conservative's see this book as a basis for their political ideas. Since I enjoy philosophy and politics, I decided to jump in.

There's a lot going on in The Fountainhead, but one of the parts I took from it was that an artist (in the case of the book, an Architect) shouldn't compromise on anything they make. When they create (buildings, music, writing), they should be going by what they want, and not creating for other people.

The deeper meaning behind this is to be your own person, and not live off someone else. There's a long speech at the end of the book about how people create something for themselves, and how some will just take what someone else worked on and either add to it and say it's their own, or critique it and say how it's not good enough.

Basically it comes down the idea of the Artist verses the Critic, and The Fountainhead places the Artist way above the Critic.

My thoughts on this topic would take a whole other post, but the idea of being a Creator instead of living life Second-hand is something that stuck with me.

So then I picked up Culture Making, a book I got at Urbana two years ago, and saw some very interesting similarities between the two books.

The main point of Culture Making is how Christians shouldn't try to change culture by critiquing or copying culture, but by actively creating culture. Andy Crouch goes into details about what Culture is, what it isn't, and how it's created, While reading the first half, I came across this passage. I think this is quite an observation about society, and not just the Church.

Just so you know what's happening, he's talking about why creating a worldview isn't enough to change culture.

The language of worldview tends to imply, to paraphrase the Catholic writer Richard Rohr, that we can think ourselves into new ways of behaving. But that is not the way culture works. Culture helps us behave ourselves into new ways of thinking. The risk in thinking “worldviewishly” is that we will start to think that the best way to change culture is to analyze it. We will start worldview academies, host worldview seminars, write worldview books. These may have some real value if they help us understand the horizons that our culture shapes, but they cannot substitute for the creation of real cultural goods. And they will subtly tend to produce philosophers rather than plumbers, abstract thinkers instead of artists and artisans. They can create a cultural niche in which “worldview thinkers” are privileged while other kinds of culture makers are shunted aside.

But culture is not changed simply by thinking.

(Sam's note: Now if only people in Washington could understand this idea...)

That's pretty much it for now. I just really liked this quote.

Work and books and church and stuff

After working at Advanced Medical Imaging for two years, I was finally able to transfer to a new area.

I am no longer a Receptionist. I now work in Medical Records.

It's a little more work. I have to remember more, but it's way less stress. I have a more set schedule, I take lunch at the same time everyday, and I don't have to stay late if we're busy (the file room stops answering calls after 5:00, so I'm free after that).

I've also been reading more. Right now I'm currently making my way through The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand. I'm loving the book so far, but I'm not sure if it's for the same reasons others do. I was gonna try and tackle Atlas Shrugged after this, but after about 500 of the 752 pages of The Fountainhead, I think I'll read something else before I try to digest the 1368 pages of Atlas Shrugged. But I will try to finish it by the end of the year.

"He must become greater; I must become less."

-John 3:30

"Worship is giving God the best that He has given you."

-Oswald Chambers

Now a quick prayer request.

About a month ago, Pastor Tom (our worship pastor at Church) asked me if I'd be interested in leading worship on a Sunday in August. I said sure, but it wasn't until I got to the car that I fully realized what happened. I think I might have accepted his offer in a way that seemed unexcited, but really I was more in shock.

What I need is prayer that I don't get a big head about this.

I'm used to leading worship. This is nothing new for me. In the three years I've been going there, I've lead worship for the college group, children's Sunday School (both with and without a band), the youth group once, and the Men's breakfast and weekend retreat.

All the time, it's been a small group, with the biggest group being a quick set of songs for a Sunday night Missionary service, where I it's not so formal, and there's no pressure. Leading worship for the main church seems more like a big deal, when it really shouldn't be.

Pray that I don't make this service about me, or trying to impress anyone. My job as a worship leader isn't to have people think about how great that song was, or how good my guitar playing is, or good of a singer is; my job is to lead people into the presence of God so they walk away from the service not saying how great things are musically, but how great God is.

I'm leading worship on August 14, so please pray for me that I don't make this about me. I really debated with myself whether or not to even bring it up to anyone, but I figured that all the people that mattered would read this and understand what I'm trying to say without thinking I'm just trying to plug when I'm leading worship. I know what abilities God has blessed me with, and I only want to return those gifts to Him, without thinking that I'm the awesome one.

Love you all, and thanks for reading!